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March 2017

Proper preparation prevents poor performance

You can never trust Maryland’s March weather. Another certainty is the march of time, which puts us only a couple of weeks from Trophy Rockfish Season, opening April 15. Cold or warm, snow, sleet, rain or sun, the striper season is fast arriving.     So don’t make opening day your first day on the water. I take at least a week for a shakedown cruise or two plus scouting trips to get ready. That means now is the time to get going.

Allen Delaney takes second place

This is our lucky week. Allen Delaney is back in fine form.     If you’re a recent Bay Weekly reader, you may not know what you’ve been missing. Delaney’s recent contributions have been brief, semi-serious dispatches. But in his Bay Weekly heyday — 2002 to 2009 — he could make his readers fall from their chairs and burst into tears — all the results of the felonious assault of laughter.

Please don’t crape murder it

I find crape myrtle 10 times more attractive than white birch trees, which we in New Hampshire consider a weed but Marylanders insist on trying to grow against the odds. It is a waste of time and money to plant white birch in southern Maryland because the summers are too hot and the winters do not provide sufficient cold to satisfy the tree’s dormancy needs. We have the ideal climate to grow crape myrtle, a tree (or shrub) that adds so much to any landscape.

Help keep birds safe on power poles

All over Chesapeake Country, people are welcoming returning osprey. After traveling 1,800 to 4,600 miles, they’re ready to settle into just the right nest. Most return to an earlier nesting spot, but two-year-olds returning on their first northward migration have to go house-hunting.     Like channel markers, utility poles are favorite nesting spots, but they are not good choices since nests on power poles can both endanger the birds and cause power outages.

This remake is doomed by its very concept; transforming the characters from cartoons into actual people kills the magic

The original it isn’t Belle (Emma Watson: Regression) is stifled in her provincial French town. She’s smart, progressive and inventive. The village is repressive, and the villagers mock her. Only the town meathead Gaston (Luke Evans: The Girl on the Train) seems to appreciate Belle, though she repeatedly rejects his offers of marriage.

Celebrate Maryland Day

Annapolis’ and Southern Anne Arundel County’s historic, cultural and heritage sites celebrate our state’s 383rd anniversary this weekend with tours, open houses, workshops and special events. As part of the celebration, all Maryland Day sites are offering free or $1 admission prices for events.

Russian National Ballet

Company performs in the Distinguished Artists Series. 7:30pm, Alumni Hall, USNA, Annapolis, $45, rsvp: www.navyperforms.showare.com.

A Night to Remember

rsvp by March 29 for April 8: Enjoy a five-course dinner like the one on the Titanic, sponsored by Calvert Library; 1912 attire optional. 6pm cash bar, 7pm dinner, Rod ‘n’ Reel Restaurant, Chesapeake Beach, $50, rsvp at any library branch: www.calvertlibrary.info.

Warrior 5K Fun Run/Walk

Raise money for Patuxent Habitat for Humanity’s Veteran Critical Home Repair Program. 8am, Three Notch Trail, John Baggett Park, Mechanicsville, $40: www.patuxenthabitat.org.

Empty Bowl Supper

Take home a free handcrafted artisan bowl after dining on local food; silent auction, plus live music. Benefits Project ECHO. 4:30-7pm, St. John Vianney Family Life Center, Prince Frederick, $30 w/discounts, rsvp: 410-535-0044 x4.