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Articles by Diana Beechener

A G rating takes the teeth out of this lion and cheetah documentary

Cheetah mother Sita stalks an antelope in the tall grasses of the Kenyan savannah. She chases her quarry, closing the gap between them with bounding strides. Sita leaps, claws out, and lands upon the antelope’s hindquarters.     And cut!     The director returns to Sita later, face smeared with blood, feeding her hungry cubs. The antelope, curiously, is nowhere to be found.     African Cats is an entertaining, if bloodless, look at the lives...

Good slasher fun is marred by lectures about the good old days.

Wes Craven (My Soul to Take) wants you damn kids to get off of his lawn. Also, the director wants the You Tube generation to show some respect for old-school slasher films.     In the reboot of the Scream franchise, the curmudgeon director sets out to prove that fusing old-school scares and new-school pop culture smarts are his forte. Craven’s got a point. When he focuses on the gore and the fun, he makes a smart, scary flick.     Ten years after the last...

An action fairytale pits a little girl against the big bad wolf.

Once upon a time there was teenager named Hanna (Saoirse Ronan: The Way Back) who lived alone in the woods with her father Erik (Eric Bana: The Time Traveler’s Wife). They spend nights reading by the fire, living off the frigid land of Finland and training in the art of the kill.     Sweet little Hanna is a blond-haired, blue-eyed killing machine. Strong as a man, capable of using just about anything around her as a lethal weapon and boasting the endurance of a soldier,...

An uninteresting lead turns a brooding gothic classic into a tepid tale of inconvenient love

There is a fundamental problem with adapting Jane Eyre into film: Most people know what’s in the attic. To counteract the English Lit 101 plot, the movie has to make you invest in the characters so that you dread what you know will befall them.     At the very least, filmmakers need to make that attic creepy.     In the latest adaptation of Charlotte Brontë’s classic novel, director Cary Fukunaga (Sin Nombre) abandoned character development for the...

A wattled crane is the National Zoo’s newest addition

On March 20, a wattled crane cracked its egg to become the third of its species to hatch in the National Zoo’s history. Unlike mammals, the crane was ready to make an appearance almost immediately, showing off its downy feathers to visitors in the Crane Run.     This baby is an important addition to the zoo for another reason: Wattled cranes are listed as vulnerable on the International Union for Conservation of Nature’s Red List of Threatened Species. Hunting,...

Great visuals get KO’ed by an insulting, incoherent script

The world has been hard on 20-year-old Babydoll (Emily Browning: The Uninvited). After being assaulted by her stepfather and accidentally killing her sister, Babydoll is committed to an asylum. In five days, she’s scheduled for a lobotomy.     Horrified by her predicament, and presumably her name, Babydoll retreats to a fantasy world. In this fantasy — which I remind you is of her creation — Babydoll dreams that she’s been sold to a brothel/cabaret. In...

A raunchy alien makes men out of two nerds

Graeme (Simon Pegg: The Chronicles of Narnia) and Clive (Nick Frost: Pirate Radio) are two nerds living the dream. The Brits combine their savings for a trip of a lifetime to California’s Comic Con. Spending money on essentials — a Gorn mask and signed copies of Jeffrey Shadowchild’s (Jeffrey Tambor) latest sci-fi tome — the pair is looking forward to an RV trip to see the great American sights.     If you don’t speak nerd, that means the pair is...

Midshipman Ari Schiff raises funds so wounded veterans can benefit from a warm heart and a cold nose

Twenty-one-year-old Ari Schiff knows the value of a dollar. In high school he earned 60,000 of them. Not for a new car or an expensive spring vacation.     Schiff earned this small fortune so that America’s VetDogs could offer two assistance dogs to help disabled veterans acclimate to life at home.     “I’ve grown up with dogs, and I’ve had this affinity for the military,” Schiff says. “So I thought it was a great way to bring...

A hilarious western cartoon spoof sure to haunt the dreams of young children

Rango (voiced by Johnny Depp: The Tourist) is a chameleon with an identity crisis. Kept in captivity, he makes himself the hero of elaborate plays, using a Barbie torso, a windup fish and a dead bug as a supporting cast.     His bleak little theater troupe is shattered, literally, when his tank falls out of his owner’s car and lands on a desert highway. Bewildered by new surroundings, Rango meets Roadkill (Alfred Molina: The Tempest), an armadillo partially flattened on...

Anne Arundel County hopes larger containers amount to a greater recycling haul

The bigger, the better. That seems to be the theory behind Anne Arundel County’s push to distribute 65-gallon recycling containers throughout the county.     “Recycling is a budgetary priority of this administration,” says County Executive John R. Leopold. “I’m always looking for ways to enhance the convenience of our recycling plan.”     Our recycling habits now fall 10 percent short of the county goal of 50 percent recycling...