view counter

 

Your guide to Chesaeake Country's freshest produce and more!

Movie Reviews

If you could do it all over again ... would you still try to shoot yourself?

In the year 2072, it’s almost impossible to get rid of a body. Fortunately, time travel has been invented. It’s outlawed, but that doesn’t stop the mob from using it to clean up their kills.     Instead of outfitting a victim in cement shoes, they chuck the poor mook into a time machine. Thirty years in the past, a Looper waits in a Kansas field with a blunderbuss and a tarp, ready to shoot, wrap and incinerate whoever shows up.

In the future, you won’t have to worry about jury duty

In a post-apocalyptic future, most of the East Coast has morphed into Mega City One, which boasts a dirty, radioactive and heavily armed population. The only thing standing between the city and chaos are the judges. This law enforcement group is entrusted to respond to crimes, sentence and, if necessary, execute criminals on the spot.     After seeing this movie, you’ll never argue with a cop again.

Don’t pick up the line unless you’re ready for a raunchy ear-full

Lauren Powell (Lauren Miller, who also co-wrote the screenplay) is living her New York dream: A perfect apartment, a closet full of cute yet conservative clothes, a career in publishing and a dreamy boyfriend.

Better living through science

Frank (Frank Langella: Unknown) has lost a few steps over the years. His body aches, his kids never visit and his memory is failing. He occupies himself by walking to the library to hit on the sexy librarian (Susan Sarandon: That’s My Boy) and wandering into a soap store that used to be his favorite diner. His son Hunter (James Marsden: Straw Dogs) is tired of dealing with his cantankerous old man.

Bring a mason jar to this true tale of moonshine and bloodshed

During the Prohibition Era, drinking didn’t diminish; it became more chic. While gangsters and molls kicked their heels up at speakeasies in Chicago, the Bondurant brothers were taking advantage of a new cottage industry, cooking up mountain dew in homemade stills tucked away in the hills of Virginia.

This bad movie is loads of fun for ’80s action fans

Remember when you listened with rapt attention to your grandfather’s stories of his glory days? Imagine that Grandpa is Sylvester Stallone, who calls in a bunch of his buddies to act out his stories. That, in essence is The Expendables 2. It’s poorly written, unevenly plotted and deeply silly. Yet it’s fun to watch action stars of the 1970s and ’80s relive their glory days.

A comedy for adults masquerading as a horror movie for children

Young Norman Babcock (Kodi Smit-McPhee: Dead Europe) isn’t very popular with the living. He’s obsessed with zombies and horror movies, awkward with kids his own age and an embarrassment to his family. But he can talk to the dead, so he’s never alone. He spends his days chatting with his departed grandmother, petting the spirits of road kill and waving to the many dead souls that line the streets of his neighborhood.

An old couple learns new tricks in this ­surprising comedy

After 30-odd years of marriage, Kay (Meryl Streep: The Iron Lady) and Arnold (Tommy Lee Jones: Men in Black 3) have a routine: Kay suffers in silence as she does housework, longing for grand romantic gestures. Arnold ignores her. They sleep in different rooms and barely touch, talk or acknowledge each other in front of their grown children.     From the outside, they’re every couple of a certain age. From the inside, it’s amazing they haven’t snapped.

Erase this unnecessary remake from your mind

In the near future, the world has become almost uninhabitable. The only areas with breathable air are The United Federation of Britain and The Colony (Australia). The rich one percent live in the UFB and force The Colony to occupy slums and work grueling hours in factories.

Worth the trip to see a brand new way to bring peace in the Middle East

War is destroying a small town in Lebanon. The bridge connecting it to the outside world is a bombed-out disaster, navigable only by scooter. Minefields blow up local livestock and occasionally injure roaming children. Women make frequent pilgrimages to the cemetery to mourn those lost to war. A single television brings the modern world to them in static-filled snippets.