Tips from the Altar
For the many couples committing to marriage this year, I offer some tips that I have learned in the past 10 years of officiating at weddings. These are not the words of advice from popular bridal magazines, but rather practical suggestions that will make your day go a bit smoother. Let’s begin with …
Get contracts for everything: Every vendor you hire should have a contract specifying, in detail, what is expected of them. The florist, for example, should list the type and color of flowers in the bouquet down to the floral arrangements throughout the venue. The officiant, venue, photographer, D.J, caterer and anyone else you are paying should have a contract. If they don’t, find someone else. And speaking of contracts …
Don’t stress over the small stuff: I had a bride so upset over her floral arrangements that she bought flowers from a local grocer and made her own arrangements. Since she did not have a commercial refrigerator, all of her flowers were wilted on the day of her wedding. Had she gone with the original flowers, no one would have noticed and she could have dealt with the florist later. (See post-dated check.)
Just assume something will go wrong, from the groom wearing one brown and one black sock to misplaced rings to wandering children. No one will remember. The only thing some people may remember is if someone in your party spontaneously bursts into flame. Even that depends on how generously the bartender is pouring.
Your wedding day will be a marathon: If this is your first wedding, you will feel overwhelmed. I compare it to an Olympic event where the guy with the starter pistol is at the foot of your bed. Instead of an alarm, he fires the gun, and you’re off! The day will go by in minutes rather than hours.
My advice: During your reception, take the time to talk to your relatives you don’t see very often and those who traveled a good distance to be there. You can see your friends anytime, but at the end of the day you will find yourself wishing that you had given more time to Uncle Ed and Aunt Rose.
I could go on, but I have laundry to do. I will leave you with the words of my wife the day after our wedding. She told our guests, “If we get divorced tomorrow, the party was worth it.” That was 13 years ago and we’re still married.
Enjoy your day; enjoy the moment.